I feel like I've been sick for a month. After the strep and the viral infection... or whatever it was... I'm left with this lingering exhaustion (mono?). That feeling like when you are lying in the tub and let the water out. It feels like you are being sucked down the drain along with the water. I get frustrated, then angry and impatient with myself. And then, I get sick again.
This past week, instead of working on our big project at school (see below), I made the executive decision to "go home and rest". So last Wed., I begged my mom to come and get me from school (I couldn't drive). I skipped classes for the rest of the week and spent a lot of time asleep.
When I finally came back to school Sunday evening, I fell asleep and missed the project meeting. Turns out, while I was away, my group finished the comic book. Ahead of schedule. I should be feeling blessed to be part of such an amazing group - but I feel like a loser.
I was overwhelmed by the tasks at home too and last night I was feeling beyond sad. I know, on a logical, intellectual level, that this is my exhaustion/sick talking. I need to give myself a break and not try to take it all on at once. In a few days, I'll be fine. I KNOW that. But last night, I needed someone else to feel as badly as I did. Not quite what I mean - I didn't want to MAKE someone else feel bad, I just wanted to know that I wasn't alone in being unhappy.
I guess that is one small change that I have actually made for the better. In the past, I'd just let it simmer or crush it down. Now, I obsess over it until I can think of someone to talk to! It really does help.
Now, I am obsessing over Lisa's worries too! But she gave me some great insights into my own concerns and shared her hard earned wisdom. And I think we both came to the conclusion that a lot can be sorted out if you can decide what outcome you actually want. I think we all (you too?) worry and worry about an event or possibilities and yet, we have no idea what the perfect solution would be. What do you WANT to HAPPEN? In the end, how does it turn out? Yeh, I don't know either. But the worries seem a lot sillier if you realize you are obsessing over something you don't REALLY care about. And maybe, what you already HAVE, is what really matters to you.
I felt so relieved after our chat, that I actually cartoon-journaled it! (Is that a thing?)
I did this really fast (for me) so it is not the best drawing ever, but it's finished and that's what matters.
[This is for you Lisa!]
And since this is supposed to be a blog about learning experiences, here is the comic before I added the grays:
As I said - I skipped classes last week. If I'd stayed at school, I would have gone to all classes, meetings, and worked until very late in the lab...
I spread out all my references on the floor of my studio. Minou (the cat) moved from one pile to another. She favored the tracing paper piles for some reason. Crunchy?
The project is to create a Silver Age Adventure Comic that is authentic-ish to 1957. Our group's comic is called "Space Scoundrels" and I would actually read the other issues if this were a "real" series. It's a great story and cool characters.
I was working on the floor (too tired to sit at the desk) so Lilah took over the drafting table and - as usual - got really excited by the task. She designed an "Ad" for the comic book...
Nice lettering, kid!
I designed all the lettering for the sound effects (here are a few)...
... and all the chapter titles...
And the lettering for the cover...
I drew everything, scanned, and cleaned up in Photoshop. Thank goodness for Google Docs - I could get the work to my classmates without going to the lab. They added my lettering to their drawings.
When I went by the lab yesterday, I found a proof copy of the comic to read. Here's what the cover looked like:
And here are a few of the interior pages:
My sound effects look cool, right?
I'm looking forward to seeing the final, printed, trimmed comic!
(If I can stay awake long enough to go to class!?)